Why is it Hard for People to Express Themselves through Words?

Everyone has a different answer to this question, and others might argue that it isn’t hard at all for a person to express themselves through words. At the core of this question I believe the answer can be found with one single word that expands into many different possible explanations: Atmosphere. Atmosphere includes everything from friends and family, to your location, and even your culture.

I find it harder to express myself through verbal communication, because both of my parents were raised in a culture where it wasn’t socially acceptable to sit and talk about your feelings at the dinner table. They didn’t have complete support from adult figures to express themselves, and as they put it, “Our parents were very narrow minded and they didn’t believe in the whole “Let’s talk about our feelings and ideals.” Even though my parents have tried to change, It has still played a minor factor into my upbringing. Although my parents are  supportive and more than willing to talk to me about anything I feel or have to say, it’s something they’re not used to and it’s quite uncommon. It’s uncomfortable as well, because I always feel like there is a correct answer that I have to give, or else I will sound like too much of complainer or oversharer. Since I don’t have the confident  ability to express myself with words around my family, it definitely harder for me to use verbal expression with friends, classmates, and even distant relatives.

Another example of atmosphere affecting expression through words can be found in the acclaimed novel, The Catcher in the Rye. The main character, Holden, a young man struggling to cope with the idea that he must leave his childhood behind and enter adulthood, has a hard time finding anybody that will listen to him. Throughout the novel, he is very indecisive and he always seems to come off with ideas from the deep end that many cannot comprehend, such as asking taxi drivers where the ducks go when the pond freezes over. In Holden’s atmosphere, he is set on his ideas, but his friends and family have affected the way he chooses to express himself verbally, because Holden has convinced himself that no one can really understand his thoughts and emotions.  It’s almost as if his friends and family have made him anti- expressive through the many times they have tried but failed to understand him. In this particular atmosphere the expressor is not challenged with incapability, but the incapability of others to accustom to what Holden is trying to say. Sometimes, it is not others faults. Sometimes, we express with words that very few will understand.

We fear not being heard because of who we are and where we come from. In a short essay, How To Tame a Wild Tongue by Gloria Anzaldúa, depicts this reality by pointing out that she was made fun of and punished for speaking broken and heavy accented english. The atmosphere surrounded by her did not allow her to express herself through verbal communication, because no one would listen. Even though she was smart, everyone around her would see her as an ignorant immigrant. After a while I can’t imagine how difficult it becomes to express yourself without the fear of being judged or shut down.

There is also an alternative answer to this question. Many others are outstanding at expressing themselves through their actions and body language rather than their words. Their atmosphere has crafted them into efficient action expressors rather than verbal communicators. These are usually people who have a harder time saying what they need to get across and rather show exactly what they mean.

In the beginning of the year I attended a sportsmanship conference on behalf of my cross country team. There were representatives from each sport in our school. As our guest speaker was talking about what it takes to be leader he asked us to move our right arm in a circular motion above our heads. After three minutes of talking and giving us examples he told us we were ready. He asked us to put our hand on our chin and as he said that he placed his hand on his cheek. We all followed him and put our hand on our cheeks when he specifically said our chin.

He started shouting, “Is that your chin brother?”

“ I had no idea my chin was located on my cheek!”

We all erupted in laughter at the mistake we had all made. When everyone settled down he explained that this activity was an example of actions speaking louder than words. He said, “Sometimes, We do things and people will follow, because actions are sometimes more powerful than any words that are said. Whether it’s a good or bad example, others are bound to follow. People might not remember what you say, but they will remember what you did and the impact that you made by your actions.” This was a clear definition of validated expression through actions. And maybe this is why people find it harder to express themselves through words. Maybe because words aren’t enough for them. Maybe it’s harder to express yourself through words, because you simply can’t. No words can ever  be enough to express your thoughts and emotions.

Some of us are shy, and some of us have too much to say. Some of us are great verbal communicators and some of us are better action orientated. I think Holden was trying to communicate that it’s difficult for people to express themselves through words whether  a person’s well at verbal expression, because it can be difficult for a person’s atmosphere to understand and process an individual’s thoughts and emotions. Whether it’s harder to express ourselves through words depends on the person’s willingness to break all difficult emotional and social boundaries to express oneself.

 

-Laura

Death of a Daily Routine

We often complain that we are stuck with a certain routine in our lives. If you look anywhere and I mean everywhere from blog sites to social media posts, you can always find people complaining about falling into a certain routine and  advising others on how they need to try something different. All their posts include the routinely quotes demanding we, “Seize and live in the moment” or simply, “Try something new.” Ironically half of those people making these posts continue on with their routine lives. I call this routinefobia (not actually a legit phobia). It’s a terrible illness where we become convinced that we are okay with these routines. It is a disease where we are afraid to try new things.

I along with others have found myself guilty of the complaining routine crew who don’t do much to change it. A huge part of me does believe that routine is structure and will help keep a person less stressed, but I do believe that it also takes away some of your ability to think for yourself. I made this weekend an experiment to see if I could successfully break away from a smaller routine in my life. This weekend I attempted to tackle my social routine, which usually consists of going to a movie, or spending my night at a shopping mall with friends. I instead, decided to dive into the world of literature by watching The Death of a Salesman in Long beach this past saturday. This was only about the third time I have gone and seen live theatre. The last two times consisted of a musical and the Nutcracker. I was around ten years old and I don’t remember  much except thinking the musical was over when it was really just intermission. I also remember being very disappointed at the fact that the Nutcracker was a show strictly on dancing and music.

I had bought my ticket to the Death of a Salesman, because I  remembered my father telling me it was an outstanding play that had been converted into a book. It seemed interesting, but the whole week, I had my doubts about attending the play. It was a step out of my comfort zone and It gave me a feeling of uneasiness not knowing what was going to happen. Finally on saturday I entered the theatre with an open mind and I was completely blown away. My friend and I were the only ones who looked under the age of twenty. It was better, because I had the feeling of being surrounded by many wise men and women. Before I get into more details of how this play was incredible, i’ll explain a little more about the play itself if it’s unfamiliar to some.

Death of a Salesman is situated in the late 1940’s where there is no option in life, but to rise to the top and become wealthy. A man is fixated on the idea that his older son is going to be somebody big and successful, and he drives himself to his death not giving up on his aspirations for his son, even though his son tell him time after time that his life is not meant for such great things. I couldn’t believe how drawn I became. The acting was no Jack Nicholson in The Shining, but the actors gave you a strong sense of belonging almost as if you could’ve easily been there along in the story development. The emotions in the theatre were so raw that actors were able to create a certain atmosphere to match their feelings, words and actions. I could feel the tension in suspenseful scenes and I emphasized with the characters. I loved every minute of the play. There was so much symbolism to take away from the play, because the play is still relevant today, after sixty years. I did not expect to have so much fun in those short two hours. At the end of the play, I felt as though I had gone through the same experience, as where I know I could not feel that by watching a movie at a theater.

This past saturday was a complete success at trying something new. If I wouldn’t have followed through, I would’ve never realized how fond I am of live theatre. It all starts with something. Trying something new at your favorite restaurant, or maybe going to see a foreign film. Possibly reading a good book for a change. Whatever it is, It doesn’t help to step outside your comfort zone and try something new. As cheesy as it sounds, you might discover a lot about the things that are truly worth enjoying.

 

-Thank you,

Laura

Social Standings

In my english class we have recently been assigned a paper, based on any social issue of our choice. We must pick six opinion articles that support your argument on your social issue, which can be found on any news website (Washington post, Los Angeles Times, etc..) After, we are assigned to annotate the news articles for specific instances and evidence that will back your own opinion. It sounds simple enough, considering all our social issues we’re faced with in today’s society, but I wanted to break out of the very “expected” issues. I predicted there would be much storm about women’s rights, political addresses for the next election, or even the events taking place in the middle east. I decided to go for the sub-popular topic of inaccurate portrayal of historical, social, political and religious standings in our media, more specifically the film industry.

I thought this was the perfect subject to touch on, because there has recently been a tremendous amount of stir directed towards recently released movies. To name a few: The Interview, American Sniper, and Selma. I knew I wanted to write on this topic but at in beginning I wasn’t quite sure of my stance. I was already committed to the idea of inaccurate portrayal of a few mishaps in media, but who hasn’t gotten a good laugh at a jab taken towards a certain group.

I have just finished my third newsletter, and through few research I have collected, many films have been misleading, whether they touch on any social issues. Inaccurate movies are produced all the time. A classical example is Pocahontas. A love story between Pocahontas and John Smith blossoms in the film. Pocahontas performs an ultimate love sacrifice near the end to save John Smith, as well as the rest of the Europeans. It turns out that Pocahontas was actually ten- eleven when she saved John Smith. Even though they did befriend each other, they had no romantic standing. It was just taken up to add interesting credit to factual history.

If we were to single out every movie that has ever been inaccurately portrayed the list would go on and on. But when does it become too much? Today some issues are too sensitive to discuss and portray. I’m not exactly a hundred percent certain about my stance on this controversial topic, but this researching experience has definitely taught me so much on social issues. I can;t wait to continue my research and come to a conclusion.

Thanks, Laura  

Laughing, Sharing, and Guessing

My [cute] baby sister amazed by her carrot.

During the middle of my sophomore year, I decided to have a Journalism class as my zero period elective. I’d say its one of the best decisions I made last year because I’ve grown to become a better writer and interviewed so many people and made so many friends.

Today, my journalism class decided to have an activity day. We all had to write a short story or experience we had as a kid. Then we had to fold up the paper and put it on a table in the front of the class, making sure our name wasn’t on it, and the editors would read the story and we would have to guess who it was.

I wrote a story about the time my baby sister was born, and I’m going to be completely honest, every bit of what I wrote is true.

“During the summer between 6th and 7th grade, my baby sister was born. I stayed at home with my aunt while my parents were at the hospital about an hour after she was born, my father sent us a picture of her. Everyone gushed about how cute she was and how guppy her cheeks were but for some reason I thought she looked okay. Just okay.

Later that day I went to my room and shut the door and made a prayer to God.

I asked. “Dear God. Please please make my sister as cute as the way everyone describes her. Please make her cute, even if it means I fail every test all the way till 12th grade.

I guess I was pretty selfless because my sister turned out to be cute and I’m a junior right now and I haven’t failed my tests :)”

The moment my classmates heard “baby sister” some of them yelled “OOOH this is Zainab’s paper!”

Reflecting on this share-a-little-memory activity, I realized there was so much I knew and didn’t know about my classmates. One can argue that none of it was really “important stuff” since these were all childhood memories, but in actuality, little (so-called insignificant) memories like this where we share our lives in the past are ones that draw people closer together.

I feel like today I really bonded with my journalism class; just laughing, sharing, and guessing peoples stories was a perfect way for everyone, even people who always seem grumpy, to share a common language. The language of love.

 

❤ Zainab